THE GIFT OF ENCOURAGEMENT

My family and I have had a challenging year! One of the things that God has done through this time is He has opened my eyes WIDE to the fact that there are so many people all around me who are experiencing hard times. Heaviness. Trials. Heartache. It has caused me to want to be an encouragement to others in the way I have needed to be encouraged! ("Do unto others...") It has set me on a journey of learning what it means to function as a body...in a big way...and reach out to those around us who may be weary in the battle! Life is hard. The Christian life is hard. We need each other! We need to be JESUS to those around us.

How can we do that?

An encouraging word...
Brian and I have been married for 21 years and have been parenting for 19 years. My in-laws have ALWAYS supported us in all we've done. Even when we have done things differently than they did, or even done things they may not have understood, they have only ALWAYS encouraged us. Whenever they come they are a JOY to serve because they are always so grateful for anything we do for them--and they make me feel like I am the best cook, the best homemaker, and the best mom in the world! "This meal is DEEEEEE-LICIOUS, Gina!" "Your home is so nice. You are an ARTIST Gina!" "Your kids are such GREAT kids!"

I know that there are much better cooks than me, much prettier homes than mine, and much better moms than I am--But when my in-laws are here they make me feel like I am THE BEST at everything!

(I want to be like them when I "grow up"!)

A surprise visit...
I will often have surprise visits from students. I love it when they come over! They encourage me so much. One night one of my student/friends brought me BIG, DELICIOUS cinnamon rolls and sparkling cider. It just so happened that Brian and Caleb were not here so we went into the kitchen and got out my "fancy" glasses. We filled them with heart shaped ice cubes and cider, ate warm cinnamon rolls, turned off the lights and lit a candle...and talked and LAUGHED! It was a treat and an encouragement!

(I wonder if there is anyone I can surprise with a visit!)


A thoughtful gift...
Recently I got a package in the mail from a friend. I opened the package to find a beautiful little gift box with some really yummy smelling candles, some Tea, and an encouraging note. Such a thoughtful gift and gesture. So encouraging. Such a blessing from a friend.

(It makes me want to go to the store and pick up some neat little candles...I wonder who I can send a package to!)


An encouraging note...
My pastor's wife will often email me checking in to see how I am. She lets me know she is praying for me and shares with me what God is teaching her from the Word. So thoughtful. She shows she cares and is thinking of me. It is so encouraging!

(Let's see....who can I e-mail!)

A servants heart...
A friend of ours came to visit my husband. He just wanted to see how he was doing during a stressful time. After Brian explained to him what is going on, our friend looked at him and said, "You and your family need a vacation...why don't you pick a weekend and you can use my beach house!"

(Hmmmm...what do I have to give to someone who is tired? How can I provide refreshment?)

A simple meal...
I was talking to a friend recently and she asked how I was doing. She had barely gotten the words out of her mouth when I started to share with her my heart, my hurts, my fears, my struggles...poor girl! (She DID ask!) I hadn't really had much opportunity to share with anyone what was going on, and she was the lucky one! Well, it didn't take long for her to share with her husband...and he wasted no time in asking my husband to go out to lunch. THEN they invited our family over for dinner. They just wanted to do what they could to encourage us. The food was excellent (it always is at their house!), the fellowship was encouraging, and we laughed a lot too! It was as if they walked up beside us, lifted our arms, put them around their shoulders, and helped us walk for awhile!

(I wonder who I can invite over for dinner!)

God regularly shows me new ways I can serve and encourage others by bringing into my life such wonderful examples of HIS people who serve!

The Gift Of Encouragement

"When I give, I give myself." Walt Whitman

"Gentle words bring life and health." Proverbs 15:4

"It's your heart, not the dictionary, that gives meaning to your words. A good person produces good deeds and words season after season."
Matt. 12 34-35 (The Message)

"Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt."
Colossians 4:6

"Bless--that's your job, to bless. You'll be a blessing
and also get a blessing."
I Peter 3:7

"An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up."
Proverbs 12:25

"The Lord loves a cheerful giver."
2 Corinthians 9:7

"She who refreshes others will herself be refreshed."
Proverbs 11:25

"Let us see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out...spurring each other on,
especially as we see THE DAY approaching."
Hebrews 10:25

YOUR LOVE IS BETTER THAN LIFE...

Life is hard. It can be confusing. It can be overwhelming.

Elisabeth Elliot defines suffering as: "Wanting something that you don't have, or having something that you don't want!" If that is true then we all face suffering of some kind.

Recently someone shared with me that because her life is always so hard she wasn't sure about this "Christianity" anymore. I told her that from my perspective the only thing that DOES make sense is God and His Word. As I have faced different trials over the years, the one thing that has kept me going is the ONE who never changes. That is God. It really doesn't make much sense to give up on the only thing that gives life meaning.

I don't know why people have to live with chronic pain, have to get cancer, or why a precious ten year old little girl had to be killed by a drunk driver. I don't know why roommates make bad decisions, why children rebel, or why husbands decide to cheat on their wives. I don't know why some parents don't show their children enough love, why friendships have to end, or why a 28 year old woman would decide to end her life. I don't know why life can seem so confusing at times, why loving people can hurt so much, or why a young man who feels called to ministry doesn't have the money to pay his school bill! I just don't know why all of this has to be...and if I focus on THESE CIRCUMSTANCES...I will get overwhelmed.

This is what I choose to focus on...
This I what I DO know...

O God,
YOU are my God,
earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
I have seen YOU
in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory.
Because YOUR love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. On my bed
I remember YOU;
I think of you through the watches of the night.
Because YOU are my help,
I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you;
YOUR right hand upholds me.
~Psalm 63

I share this for my friend who feels like life is too hard...for my friend who is overwhelmed and confused...and for those who are hurting.

I pray you find it to be an encouragement too.

Keep clinging to the hem of His garment!
What happens if we stop clinging?
I don't even want to think about that!

"...YOUR LOVE IS BETTER THAN LIFE!"

My Daddy Spanks Me And I Cry Really Loud!

I was sitting at my kitchen table with a young mother and her three year old, when the the "angelic" little face looked at me and said, "My daddy spanks me and I cry really loud!" I had to keep myself from laughing! I asked why her daddy spanks her and then told her what a good daddy she has because he wants to teach her! She said, "Yeah! But my daddy spanks meand I cry really loud!"

I wanted to say, "ME TOO! I understand! My Father spanks me too! And sometimes I want to cry REALLY LOUD!"

I can relate to this precious three year old. I am so much like her...in my heart! I can forget the things that my Father has tried to teach me. I get too easily distracted! I become lazy or resist what I know I need to do. Sometimes I don't even FEEL like obeying!

Then my Father "spanks" me. He gets my attention. He puts me back on the right track. He firmly but lovingly reminds me of what is right, and when I see how rebellious I can be...
I feel like crying really loud!

So...with that three year old I say:

My Daddy spanks me....

Heb. 12:6 -11 "Because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son. Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."

Proverbs 29:15 "The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother."

Proverbs 13:24 "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him."

...and I cry really loud!

2 Corinthians 7:9 "Yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended..."

2 Corinthians 7:10 "Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret..."

Psalms 6:9 "The LORD has heard my cry for mercy; the LORD accepts my prayer."

WHO ARE YOUR COMPANIONS?

Recently we were challenged by someone to consider who our companions are. He suggested that the companions we keep are not just the people we spend our time with, but our companions are also anything that may regularly take up our time/mind in the way of the media, music, books, magazines. People have a significant impact on our lives, whether it be for good of for bad, but that which has consistent input into our lives comes in other forms and has as much of an effect in shaping and molding us into who we are becoming, whether it be for good or for bad! (In fact, my husband suggested that we may actually spend more time with the media then we do with our friends!)

After being challenged in this way I knew that I had to take some time to think about and study this further. I have spent time in the Word and have been compiling a list of the shows and music. Then I read reviews, checked out TV shows, investigated the most popular artists. What I found was very sobering.

I know this will not win me any popularity contests! But I'm really okay with that!

I researched blogs, myspace and facebook. I compiled a list of the top 4 TV shows and top 5 artists that people are saying are their favorites, and that they view on a regular basis. I will only list the top 4 or 5, but there are many more that I could list. I will give a brief review of the content. (Warning: the content I found IS offensive ...)

SOME POPULAR TV SHOWS:

FRIENDS
One of the characters is sleeping with a guy she is not married to. Another friend is dating a beautiful woman, who is not only married, but has another boyfriend. He is thrilled at the prospect of having "all the fun but none of the responsibility," Another friend, who is an aspiring actor, gets a job for a TV show in which he will have to pose nude. One of friends characters accidentally sees one of the other characters wandering around topless after her shower, a chain reaction of nudity ensues when she tries to even the score by seeing his private part. Another friend finds out that his father is having an affair and tries to hide it from his mom. One of the characters gets divorced when he finds out that his wife is a lesbian. There is consistent reference to homosexuality.

GREYS ANATOMY
One of the female character "loves playing the field" and picks up a cute guy in a bar and brings him home for the night before her first shift. She then has an affair with a married man that she met at work, and he has to decide who he wants to be with..her or his wife. There are scenes where characters are found making out/having sex in elevators, hospital rooms, and storage closets.

GOSSIP GIRL
Minutes into the premiere one of the characters drags her boyfriend to her bedroom to consummate their relationship. Frenzied kissing and garment removal halt when the girl mentions that another girl is back. Soon we learn that the boyfriend can't get the girl who is back off his mind, thanks to a bodice-grasping flashback that reveals how the pair stumbled into a drunken sexual tryst the year before. Despite those initial fireworks, however, not every episode has focused on teen lust. The most frequent illicit activity has been from a predator, whose conquests (except for attempts to force himself on a naive freshman, as well as on another female character) are alluded to more than shown.

Arguably, even more poorly behaved are the teens' filthy-rich parents, whose bad examples in relationships, sex and financial stewardship offer virtually nothing positive for their children to emulate. Nor is there an intact, healthy marriage anywhere to be seen.

ONE TREE HILL
Unrestrained hormones control much of what gets said and done around Tree Hill, N.C. The love triangles get complicated fast. Lucas falls for Nathan’s girl, Peyton. Nathan falls for Lucas’ best friend, Haley. Peyton’s friend, Brooke, falls for Lucas. Etc. Haley has professed to being a virgin (she stops Nathan from taking off her blouse during a make-out session), but everybody else seems eager for action. When it doesn’t happen, smoldering disappointment results. “I do not want to live in a world where fine and willing girls like ourselves can have such a lame Friday night,” Brooke moans after sexual plans fall through. “I’ve gotta change my karma.” One Tree Hill glamorizes substance abuse. Even when Peyton is victimized by a would-be rapist at a beer party, her friends don’t seem to get the point. In the very next episode, Brooke (often seen drunk or high) cooks up fake IDs so she and Lucas can go drinking, and Nathan starts popping performance-enhancing amphetamines.

THE OFFICE
The series has some real negative content issues. There is foul language, for one, but there is also crude and abusive joking, and sexual innuendos. I'm not so sure it is worth sifting through all the questionable content in order to have a few laughs. I don't think this is the kind of companion God would want for us...

SOME POPULAR ARTISTS:

MARIAH CAREY
Love songs such as "I'll Be Lovin' U Long Time" and "O.O.C." treat love as an addiction requiring a physical fix. After some superficial self-promotion on "I'm That Chick," a woman offers herself to a man for a night of passion. The hit "Touch My Body" is an even more explicit proposition (lyrics I cannot bring myself to post!) that includes Carey warning her lover not to make a YouTube video of their romp. She also can't resist a guy she knows has fathered children with six women ("Cruise Control"). A night of clubbing finds a couple sipping tequila as they "Migrate" from one hot spot to the next. A CD poster reveals side nudity of the artist wearing only a feather boa.


JOHN MAYER
Repeated mild profanity. Mayer asks, “Is there a God?” on “New Deep,” but then tells himself that it’s pointless pondering. An unfortunate line on “Home Life” leaves the door open to no-fault divorce (“If it doesn’t work out/Give her half of my stuff”). “Come Back to Bed” does not establish a marital context.

CHRISTINA AGUILERA
Its empowerment message urges females to be proudly promiscuous. Sexual material abounds. Some is implied, such as when Aguilera complains that a guy snores in bed ("Under appreciated"). But it also gets explicit. "Dirty" uses dancing at a bar to introduce sensual activities (the goal is "sweatin’ till my clothes come off"). She gives in to a Latin lover on "Infatuation." "Get Mine Get Yours" is all about casual sex with no strings attached ("We make love, but don’t fall in love"). Profanities intrude. CD art features suggestive and immodest photos.

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE
On "SexyBack" Timberlake uses foul language. Risqué lyrics make an indecent proposal ("Let Me Talk to You: Prelude") and note, "I'm a freak you right each and every night" ("Summer Love"). Notoriously crude guest artists make things more explicit. Snoop Dogg tells a model to disrobe, and Justin chimes in with more indecent lyrics that I could not bring myself to post! Alcohol flows in the form of champagne, Hennessy and a "yellow bottle" that offers a buzz.

AMY WHINEHOUSE:
Despite admitting that she has a drinking problem, the singer's pride and lack of commitment keep her from going to "Rehab" ("I ain't got 70 days/ ... There's nothing you can teach me"). She uses foul language and crass slang. There is a song that gives nods to cocaine and marijuana On "Tears Dry on Their Own" a woman hates to see an adulterous affair end and anticipates becoming "some next man's other woman soon." Speaking of unfaithfulness, she tells a guy bent on marrying her that he crossed her mind recently while she was "in the final throes" with an old flame ("You Know I'm No Good").

Are these the companions that God desires for us to spend hour upon hour with? Let's check out a few verses and see what He says about that:

Proverbs 13:20 "He who walks (as a companion) with wise men is wise, but he who associates with fools is a fool himself and shall suffer for it."

Proverbs 12:26 "The (consistently) righteous man is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked causes others to go astray."

I Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be so deceived and misled! Evil companionship's corrupt and deprave good morals and character."

2 Tim. 2:22 "Shun youthful lusts and flee from them, and aim at and pursue righteousness, (all that is virtuous and good, right living, conformity to the will of God in thought word and deed); and aim at and pursue faith, love, and peace, in fellowship with all who call upon the Lord out of a pure heart.

Ephesians 5:11 "Take no part in and have no fellowship with the fruitless deeds and enterprises of darkness, but instead let your lives be so in contrast, as to expose and reprove and convict them."

Proverbs 12:26 "The righteous man is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked causes other to go astray."

Proverbs 9:6 "Leave off, simple ones (forsake the foolish and simpleminded) and live! And walk in the way of insight and understanding."

Psalm 1:1 "Blessed is the man who walks and lives not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path where sinners walk, nor sits down where the scornful gather. But his delight and desire are in the law of the Lord, and on His law he habitually meditates by day and by night."

"You've heard the old saying, 'You are what you eat!' It's probably just as accurate to say, 'You are what you hang out with!' If we want to be wise, mature, and godly, we need to make friends with people who have those qualities." (Do Hard Things/Alex and Brett Harris)

If your "hanging out" is in front of the TV, listening to music, or reading books and magazines, know that you are making whatever content is there your companion and it will shape your way of thinking and affect whether or not you grow into a godly, mature, and wise person.

Here are some sobering examples from God's Word of those who did not choose wise companions:

In 2 Kings 2:23-25 we see Elisha and some youth. They chose foolish companions and the entire group was destroyed.

Numbers 16:1-33 tells us of Korah and his companions, who rebelled against authority, and were all destroyed.

Solomon's heart was turned to other gods by his wives in 1 Kings 11:1-8. He had his kingdom taken away.

In 1 Kings 12:8-16, Rehoboam departed from wisdom and elders' counsel, and took the advice of the younger ungodly counselors. It led to a rebellion, split the country, led to heartache for David, his family and the nation.

Jehoshphat made alliance with Ahab, and with Ahaziah. He was threatened in battle, his ships were destroyed. (2 Chr. 18:3, 19:2, 20:35-37)

Judas Iscariot allied himself with the enemies of Jesus, became picture of betrayal, and that choice led to his eventual suicide. (Matt. 26:14-16)

These are all examples of the effects of choosing wrong companions.

Whether it's people you make your companions or the choices of media, entertainment and books you consume, you will be affected by these choices. The Scriptures are very clear, as you have seen, that we must be so cautious and guarded.

As I pondered the concept that my companions were not just those we spend our time with, but also any kind of media, etc, I started viewing the the shows or DVD's that we watch in a different light. It's not so much that we are watching "bad" stuff...but it's easy to spend too much time with this "companion" that does little to encourage us on to maturity...or help us become more like Jesus. It's too easy to waste time doing everything BUT what I am called to do at the moment. When I do that I not only waste time, but I waste the precious opportunities that God has placed before me! And even worse, I am CHOOSING to NOT glorify God with what He has entrusted to me.

I pray that you will be challenged to rethink who/what you are making your companions. Every minute matters. Every second counts. Are you using those seconds and minutes in a way that causes you to become more like Jesus? Are you choosing good companions? Are YOU a godly companion?

Time is short. Use it wisely.